Showing posts with label vomit. Show all posts
Showing posts with label vomit. Show all posts

Wednesday, 28 December 2011

Bored

What I am doing right now:

Listening to an album by Walls called Coracle
Watching a Youtube video of American people at shooting ranges
Googling 'contemporary' because I wasn't confident that I could spell it correctly

I'm quite bored.

My Hueco trip is getting closer and my training is still plodding along nicely. I don't feel particularly strong. I guess I feel stronger than when I was 13. I guess that's mainly because when I was 13, I was suffering from a severe case of appendicitis. I almost died. I was at school and started throwing up everywhere. Then I went home (got a lift) and the doctor came round and said 'Oh right, well I dunno what's up'. Then went to hospital and they cut my abdomen open and threw my septic appendix at a bin (I actually wanted to keep it, but I was told that I couldn't because 'it was all dissolved and most of it is floating around your body, hence the near death experience'). I've forgotten why I started writing this, I guess I wanted to talk about dying. I wasn't really aware that I could have died since I have a huge amount of faith in modern medicine (hence why when my dad had a heart attack and was rushed to hospital, I was almost indifferent) and also when I was 13, I had a very nonchalant outlook on life.

When I go to Hueco, I really want to go to a shooting range. That's a big plus point about going to America. I'm interested in firing at someones feet (probably Jon's) and forcing him to dance around (like in Back to the Future III). Hmm, I doubt the owners of the range would allow that though. Probably a big risk of a ricochet or perhaps young kids will see me do it and so try to emulate it at home, even though they lack the required hand eye co-ordination which I have in abundance.

Friday, 16 September 2011

Film ideas

I have just returned from a trip to Tescos Metro. I went there to get some white chocolate cookies but annoyingly they didn't have any. Realising that I had driven all that way for nothing, I wandered around the store trying to think of something to buy. I settled on a pack on Starbusts, 5 ring donuts and some chewing gum. I'm now sitting at my desk writing this, whilst also watching a youtube video of would-be officers at West Point Military Academy. In one scene, they're all sitting in some sort of speech day style thing, like a school assembly. I then started thinking about wouldn't it be annoying if you're sitting there with everyone when you feel the need to do a poo. That would be so awkward because you'd have to stand up, in front of everyone, and try and discretely walk off. I wonder if you'd be allowed to go. Hmm probably not, maybe because it's 'macho' to hold your poo in. I don't know. I always wondered about that. Do the military give training about resisting the need to use the loo? I guess so, because you see those soldiers outside Buckingham Palace just standing there and I doubt that they'd be allowed to go off to use the loo. That would be a good idea for a film - a hardcore ex-delta force soldier who has a persistent bladder infection. The film would be about him (Larry) trying to fight terrorists whilst also having to deal with the bladder infection. In one scene, all of the CIA chiefs are being briefed about a situation when one turns about and says 'Where's Larry?', another would reply 'Oh, he's just nipped out to the loo again'. And if he's in combat with his team, under fire, and he just shouts out 'Oh crap, I need a wee' and his team mates (who'd know of his condition) would go 'Ok, you go and we'll cover you' and he'd be like 'Ah, it's really painful and nothing's coming out, all this gunfire is ruining my concentration too, aahhhhh damn this persistent bladder infection'. Not sure how the film would end, maybe with him finally going to the doctors and getting the suitable antibiotics. And then in a post credits scene, you'd see him at a mate's bbq, eating some food, and he says 'This chicken doesn't look fully cooked, oh well, still rather tasty'. When suddenly the phone would ring and it's the government saying terrorists are going to attack the country within the next 12 hours and he'd say 'Uh oh'.

This is the youtube video that made me think about using the toilet and stuff. I think the root cause of this line of thought is that when I was at school, during my pre-teens, I got really scared that I'd shit myself in front of everyone during school assemblies. And that led to me getting addicted to codeine phosphate for 3 years.